Omg babe I’m so tired will you lay down next to me? 🥹💘 Happy end of February and beginning of March… has spring sprung? I wish you a happy end of winter + beginning of warmer months, even tho it’s crazy raining here still… btw Like this post if my body incites a springtime boner hehe ;) 💐🌸
💗 it has been a really long time since I released new videos, so here is my March campaign for my therapy bill needs … cosplay sex tapes+ ton of free vids!! 💗
I made 7 videos!!! Actually 8… actually 9… 😳 are we counting the BTS cause then it’s like 21 vids… 😳 🤯
I guess I will not talk as much about *why* I am needing the therapy because I have made already probably too many emotional posts… and instead describe my porn to you here. I would be really thankful if you contributed to this ❤️ I am still a bit behind on my messages but know that I will get to it soon and highly appreciate you!! 🥺 Of course I will answer everything as always but I do prioritize the ones with tips attached. Sending a tip also auto pins your message to the top of my inbox, ensuring that I get toit faster. In general as I’ve previously stated in my recent posts since I am working on my book and my art right now, my OF structure has changed. It also can be hard for me sometimes to create a thoughtful response, esp if I am going through something overwhelming and rough, but these vids are all ready for me to hit send in your inbox 😘💙
*Contributeurs will get!!! (All will receive something special + the first few tippers will receive a personnaliséd message from moi) … en Français?? 🇫🇷 🥐
Allllll of my content has 169% quality assurance so you will always get the very best nastya valentines experience possible!!
7- thank you for supporting me ☺️ I’ll send you some pics from these shoots!!
17- a spin the wheel of a random video from this set! 😈
27- zero two from darling in the franxxxxxxx sex tape!! This is one of my most detailed and heartfelt cosplay videos and I just loved it so much … I know you will too! It’s a very personal POV 💕
47- bundle of all the non-cosplay videos 💛
77- bundle of 4 cosplay videos ♥️ (Asuka, shego part 1 +2, zero two) and maybe a little surprise ;) almost an hour of content!!!
127- all of these 7 videos !!! more than an hour of me 🥵
Tips of 128 or higher will receive all 10+ of the BTS videos plus a secret 8th tape 🤫 (it’s me in a kind of public place doing something kind of naughty) mmm* 😋🌟
😈
🥐🥐🥐🥐🥐🥐🥐🥐
**Let me list all seven of them 🥵 :
❤️ Asuka from Evangelion (cute gf w attitude pov, butt plug, natural cock dildo, 13mins) 🖤 shego from Kim possible (villain joi, big green dildo riding, one of the messsssiest cum videos I ever made, 15 min) 💚 shego from Kim possible part 2 😏 (magic wand vibrator, different styling from the first one, 5 min) 💖 zero two from darling in the franxx (I’m ur loving but emo gf pov, playful attitude, using a rabbit toy cause um it’s year of the rabbit!🐰 12 min)
💙 blue rainbow lingerie sex tape w a bad dragon dildo 🌈 💙 blue rainbow lingerie sex tape with a butt plug 🖤casually kinky video, just silly me in a cozy little sheer set**
🥐🥐🥐🥐🥐🥐🥐
I will not be making as much content in March so take advantage of this while I have it <3 Hope you enjoyed these free vids especially the first one in the blue rainbow delphine set ;) 💙 What did you think of the preview videos… did you like them? 💘
Hi I just wanna thank you guys for making me feel so special when I am not feeling cute 🥺❤️🩹 Reading ur comments made me emotional omg… sorry for being such a downer!!! Some days I just really get consumed by my own inertia but now is a new day and I’m feeling better. I’m gonna look thru messages today and post some new vids tn as well ilysm 🌙 ✨
⚠️ **Warning long post…** ⚠️😵💫💘☣️ What porn stars don’t talk about: the psychic consequences of posting the naked body in the cyber world.
To be nude online is to attract viewers and unintentionally invite comments about the body. This can be amazingly liberating, and this can also backfire horribly.
There are some days that in terms of body image are like a hellish hell.
Some days it has the opposite effect, where the compliments I receive make me genuinely feel good. Overall it has been healing. My confidence has in the grand scheme actually improved a lot with OF. To be honest I never felt attractive to myself until I started doing sex work. My job heralded my sexual awakening and a healing from past SA traumas. Without a doubt, I love myself more: I’m glad to be doing this and I love bringing you my horny artistry. Still, like today, there are hellish days where I hate my body.
How to forgive? That can be the hardest part.
The first step for any problem is to admit you need help. And I do. I need a lot of help not hating myself. My dedicated team of therapists is pretty much essential to my survival.
There is simply not enough literature on body image issues in porn. They without a doubt exist but are invisible because we as performers do not want to ruin the illusion that we are anything less than perfect, confident, capable — the fantasy. Your fantasy.
While I am proud of my body (of work, that is) and confident that I’ve imprinted a unique signature into the world of obscure porn that dovetails with cinematic art, I cannot look at my past works without feeling disgusted at every fat fold, chubby angle, or squishy thigh.
This calls to a bigger picture of fat phobia in our society. It’s so wrong and obviously should not be that way, yet in people like me who grew up in the 2000s and 2010s when the too-thin aesthetic was in, it’s almost inevitable. The propaganda is deep in our brains.
I used to have a folder in my computer that contained my own version of porn — photographs of me at my thinnest, rib cage and hipbones jutting, no space for my internal organs, skin almost transparent, hair falling out. For a while I wished to look like that again. When I recovered I deleted that folder because I essentially used it to trigger myself. I don’t care about external thinspiration — what was special about this was that *I* did it. If I had applied the mental energy to being thin, to other avenues instead, I would be much more successful by now.
With therapy and spiritual guidance (yes I am into the “woo woo stuff”) I can hold together a healthy mindset for as long as possible. Women’s bodies are mysterious and weight naturally goes up and down depending on hormones, stress, etc and is even more variable in front of the camera, which as we all know adds pounds. I also tend to shoot myself from the even unflattering “mommy angle” aka from below, to look taller. I love the height it gives me, as I’m just a little over 5’ without heels, but as a stylistic choice it’s also a fattening one. I’ve also recently sustained an injury to my legs, which left me a little bit immobile and unable to exercise.
I always think of myself as sedentary and physically lazy, but this experience showed me just how much physicality and Manual labor goes into my job. I also walk a lot, even tho LA is not a walkable city. Not being able to perform my physical duties and being laid up on the couch these days made me feel sloppy, floppy, and uncomfortable.
Last year I was diagnosed with a painful stomach condition called gastroparesis which is literally a paralyses of the stomach nerves. With medication and medical visits I am a lot better now, and while it can’t be cured, I am successfully managing it. However, this also means that I have put on weight and I am distraught in a whole other way. I feel fatter because I am able to eat normally, healthily, and not feel pain when I do. Fat is a feeling and a state of mind. How horrible is that?
It’s obviously a turn off to talk about this, and a turnoff to talk about having low confidence.
It’s really never discussed in our culture but many people think porn stars and nsfw creators are always confident in (and even proud of) our bodies because we can publish them online for others to watch, gawk, judge. That the exhibitionism brings invincibility. Just because we do porn we’re immune to these body issues right? How I wish that were true. It’s strange because this issue is so complex.
As if intentional nudity brings an immunity to self esteem issues….I did not know what an innie or an outie was until I started posting on Reddit. Even women’s most intimate body parts- nipples, labia, asshole… are all subject to scrutiny. I learned a lot from posting online, both good and bad, all fascinating. What I found was that people who paid to have a subscription to me were generally courteous and respectful (cause why would you waste money to troll someone you don’t even like?) but the majority of viewers commenting online were entitled and despicable. Disgusting perverted men gawking and judging much younger women on their bodies. Online, these disgusting incel men have their pick of the litter when irl none of the ladies posting would give them a second look. The disgustingness is not in terms of appearance but in personality. They are sadistic. This is another reason why older women do not engage these sadistic men — they won’t take any of the bullshit that a younger women with less sense of boundaries would.
But ageism in porn is a whole other article. I will delve into it some time later. It’s not enough to simply be nude, youthful, attractive, before an audience; one must also be perfect. Quiet, submissive, not outspoken, not “extra”, not a hot mess, not depressed, not over the hill, not over weight (unless a milf or thicc fetish category). Everything in our contemporary society has to fit into appealing little categories and I hope that era gets untangled soon. I hope at the very least I can do something to dismantle this fixed system and create a grey area. There is no representation for the “in between” — not skinny, not fat, just average. And as much as I hate to be categorized as such, here I am, begrudgingly representing for the average, the normal, the messy, the ugly, the real. It was the worst when a while ago a fellow girl who I worked with wrote what she thought was my weight # was on one of her socials, and that just aggravated me on many many levels. Thank you for pushing me back into the closet. Thank you for the insecurity, you may as well have bashed my head in and called it a day.
“Insecurity is unattractive/ anxiety is not hot / depression is unsexy”… I hear that all the time. It damages my business. We’re supposed to conceal. My job is to be a fantasy, not a human. But I cannot with a clear conscience perform against myself and my boundaries. I cannot undo what I have already posted but I can reconsider my future and what my OF will look like. I have some cute videos that I’m sitting on but I’m not sure if I wanna release them yet. I will think about it. I want reassurance that I look good, and not just in my own delusion. There is a quote I forget attributed to whom, which goes “delusion is more necessary to our happiness than reality”. God damn is that ever true.
I do not want much from this world, all I really want is the reassurance that I am skinny and thin. Dainty. Delicate. A fragile, rickety Victorian doll. Admittedly it just makes me sad that I’m not seen as thin. I think if I had a constant stream of people telling me how skinny I was, I would probably float on cloud 9 in a happiness I’ve been so deprived of. On the other hand… If I was very fat and plus size and BBW I would have a moneymaker niche to exploit. Yes, I participate in this blatant hypocrisy as well. But the ordinariness of the middle ground is agony.
This is an ongoing topic. I have to step outside myself to dive deeper.
That’s enough for here and already too long and dark sided of a post on OF. Sorry about that. It’s not forever; thank god everything is temporary. I know I’m gonna get over this and feel like a sex goddess once more and resume posting nudes again and say hello from my little padded room and hope you continue to enjoy my content…
***I will expand on this thought soon for my Cyberhorny site, https://cyber-horny.com*** 💘
Like this post if you see it I guess so that I don’t feel stupid about posting it…. If you actually read through this whole shit, comment one of ur favorite animals. I’ll go first; 🦦.
I meant to post this earlier but my internet went out cause of the crazy rain storms in CA and only a few of my scheduled posts went through ;_; 🌧️ Happy twin peaks day!! I hope you enjoy **my** twin peaks… like this post if you do!! 🍒 🦉 ☕️
You get a free G/G clip when you DM my slutty busty friend @fionaslilsecret and tell her I sent you🧚🏼♀️ She is the sweetest and kinkiest girl I know… I told her to give my subs a ✨$7 SALE✨ only today and you can see her fully explicit feed right now 💦 #ad
My **Cyberhorny** book outline pdf, (2022 version) which should be read by all. I often reference this in messages but since it can be a hassle to look for it on my profile here it is. 🌟
Can this weekend be “one for the books” lol? 🌟📕 it doesn’t look like this will make the campaign goal but if someone wants to get me this book set (wishlist in bio) I will seriously e-love you forever and ever 🖤🥺 👉👈 https://onlyfans.com/525218780/nastyavalentine
I can be ur angle or ur devil.. 🤍 These pics were taken in the tiniest little hotel bathroom in Rome, when I went to Italy last year. It was one of the best moments *of my whole entire life* and I hope I get the chance to travel somewhere again. I’ve been feeling in a dark place this winter with anxiety and depression, and I think back to Italy when I feel stressed or down. While it’s not an end all be all fix, it actually does help me. Do you have any good things you think about to cheer yourself up when you’re down? 🤍
Is it a lucky day? It’s 2:22 on 2/22, here’s 22 pics I hope u like 🎀☺️ Tip $2 if you reaallly like, and if you also support my writing + creative endeavors 💞💋
What do you think I’m writing about in my horny diary?
Happy **222** my love 😍 22 nudes, part 1 of 2 💔 Like this post if you think I look cute here… these are relevant to a full length 22min sexy video I just made ✨
Tip $2 or more for good luck today on 2/22 🥺 Tip $22 if you want 2 22min vids in your inbox (44mins… aka almost an hour) ❤️
I’ll be sending the bundle soon! I made a cum video this morning and it’s too horny + a ton of things like spontaneous going-out nudes that are special because 99% of the time I am just at home.. having a semi public secret makes it naughty! Swipe for Carl video + talking 🐈⬛
While there has been a lot of tough shit going on lately, I really try to persevere through my art, especially my *Cyber (horny)* projects. Please know that all of you here are instrumental to helping chug my vision along, and there will soon be more **Cyberhorny** things to come. I am so grateful, nervous, excited, aaaahh. A new era of Nastya is happening. Meanwhile, let me harken back to my art show, *Cyber Castle*… 🏰 🌙 💕
Even tho no one has been liking my posts I know I looked sexy tonight and no one can take that away from me 🕊️ I’m just gonna post more on the story instead of the feed. I took myself to see an amazing movie that made me nostalgic and will do a sexy dinner tomorrow ; tippers of my new campaign will get all the behind the scenes stuff as I go out, much more to cum 💗
I want to take myself out on a date, dinner and drinks and a movie 🍿🎥 🥂 I’m not gonna lie my valentines was not a fun one, will you join me on an e-date?
Two videos in this post, a short nude one and long vlog type that’s kind of more messy and emotional where I talk about what has been going on. On v day I accompanied my only family member in LA/the US as a whole, to an emergency medical procedure and it goes without saying that it was the opposite of how I’d want to spend v day, or any day for that matter. I also injured my knees earlier in the month so it was like the blind leading the blind. My injures are not all the way recovered but doing much better now so I would definitely like to have a chill night out ✨ Going out in LA is ridiculously pricey which is why I never do it, hence this campaign to cover the costs of ticket, food, drink, and uber. Last time I went out a month ago it was actually a lot of fun and I would love to give you an even more in depth going-out-with-my-homebody-ass experience :)
*If you want to join me:
$7- yay! treat me to a popcorn 🍿💋 maybe do the thing where you put it in your lap until there’s no popcorn left and I’m touching your crotch 😅
$23 - the cost of a movie ticket in LA! I actually have only seen one movie since Covid happened so I would love to see something in theaters instead of on my couch. I’ll find a moment to be horny in the theater and show you video proof ;)
$45 - dinner time!! I’ll give you a delicious snack 😋 (yes this means a cumming video!)
$77 - take me home and play with me! I’ll make sure you put your 🍆 in my 🍑 and make you a post-night video where we get back to my place… like a visual representation of GFE, you’ll get all of the above videos from the start of my night all the way to waking up at my place in the morning… rise and shine baby ☺️
$99 or higher: I have the opportunity to go out Saturday, Sunday, and Monday for movie, dinner, and drinks. Contributers of this amount will receive 3 nights of the contents I make for each so they’ll be sent between the 18th to the 21st*💕
I don’t like drinking at home alone but I like a little cocktail when going out, so looks like with some liquid courage I’ll get extra frisky for you 💋🥂 if you’re waiting for a custom or cock rate, those will be sent by the end of the week!! Except the ones that are more intensely active because my kneees are still recovering but I promise it will still be fulfilled soon as I am good to go ❤️🩹
What did you think of the little videos I posted? I hope the little nude display of my body made up for the depressingness of the long one.
It is always so weird posting nudes from a hospital setting 🏥 Still, it’s almost like a reflex at this point. This time I didn’t even wear a bra or panties at all. Sometimes like the lack of undergarments there’s also a lack of words, idk what to say
A nude pic to make your day better ❤️ I added a few things to my wishlist: really wanted a few books and musical instruments and yes a fainting couch/therapist’s chair for my cats lol but obvs this is non-necessity, just desires for my small serotonin :) If you get me something I promise to spoil you right back 😘✨ https://www.amazon.com/hz/wis… 💋
Photoshoooot with a … balalaika!!🍀💚✨ There’s a lot going on in these pics, some of this photo set is quite naughty and explicit 🥵 Pls show this post some love if you want more like this!!
Also — do you prefer longer photo sets of 20+pics, or shorter ones like 1-10 pics? Basically do you actually scroll through the whole photo album, or do you just look at the first pic in the series? 🧐